One Horror of a Picture Show
by purnip
Summary: A Rocky Horror Picture Show influenced play on how the Sound 'Five' came to be. There will be foul languange, since Tayuya's involved. Expect randomness later on. You may be offended, and that's okay. I'm offended too. XD
1. Chapter 1

One Horror of a Picture Show

A cross between Naruto and the Rocky Horror Picture Show, naturally. Warped to fit, so don't flame me for not sticking true to either play or anime. It's tough, I'll tell you that much.

Anyways, it's very AU-ish (like, in an alternate universe). Like, there are cars and stuff that aren't in the anime. You'll live, right? It's centered around the formation of the Sound Five, so if you were comming in hopes of seeing Sasuke or Naruto, you'll be deeply disappointed.

Disclaimer: I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show (no one can by now. XD) and I don't own Naruto. I do own a copy of Microsoft Word, so you better watch out.

This is in a play format. I had to, so there could be some form of justice.

Cast:

Jirobo- Tayuya's brother-in-law to be.

Tayuya- Jirobo's sister-in-law to be.

Kabuto- Orochimaru's right hand man and main manservant.

Orochimaru- Master of the Oto Mansion.

Kidomaru-One of Orochimaru's servants.

Sakon- Another one of Orochimaru's servants.

Ukon- Sakon's brother. A little bit of an odd misfit that Orochimaru never liked.

Kimimaro- Orochimaru's latest obsession.

**Narrator**

Now we all know about the Sound Five; Orochimaru's prime bodyguards and henchmen. How is it though, Orochimaru being one of the most selfish and unkind men, that these five came to be under his net? Did he drug them, poison them, hypnotize them until they were dead in the brain?

No. All it took was this ghastly scenario, so outrageous that it could only occur in an alternate dimension. And maybe a little mix of all that other crap.

So welcome to my little play. Yes. I know it's a rip. Sue me if you can find me! XD

Act 1 Scene 1

Jirobo and Tayuya are driving on an unpaved road, on their way to their parent's wedding. Having been on the road for several hours, they seem to be utterly lost. Night is falling, and Tayuya is at the wheel; Jirobo is in charge of the map.

Tayuya: "For the last fucking time, how long until we reach SR 60!?" _Looks back_. "Did we already jump the damned border?"

Jirobo: "Watch your language. Keep going straight for a few more miles and—"

Tayuya: "What the fuck? We've been on the road for seven hours. SEVEN HOURS! We were supposed to, according to the map, turn at the interstate, but NOOOOO! I bet you sent me to Tim-buttfucking-to just to piss me off!"

Jirobo: (Snaps) "Stop cursing! Cursing doesn't solve ANYTHING!" _He crumbles the map and tosses it out the window. _" It didn't help us get to civilization two hours ago, and it won't help us now! I don't even think we're on a road anymore! We might just be in hell already! This is the devil's cruel joke! I see it now, leaving me in the god-forsaken car with you for the rest of eternity! STOP ASKING ME ALREADY BECAUSE LOOK! I DON'T HAVE THE MAP!"

Tayuya: "Did you…did you just toss the map out the window? YOU DID! YOU JUST TOSSED THE MOTHER FUCK-ING MAP OUT THE MOTHER FUCKING WINDOW!"

Jirobo: "That's it. Stop the car."

Tayuya: "It's darker than the inside of my eyelids out here! Hell no! YOU TOSSED THE FUCKIN--"

Jirobo: "STOP THE FUCKING CAR!!!" _Grabs steering wheel and jerks it to the right. _

_Tires screech, the car veers off the road and swerves dangerously through the trees. Both scream and clutch each other as the car rampages onward, coming to a halt via contact with a large stone structure of sorts. Both fly through windshield and land in a crumpled heap before the driveway of a dark edifice. Lights dim._

_Act 1 Scene 2_

_Jirobo and Tayuya stir, now miraculously in near perfect condition, and at first they look at each other, amazed, and then they look at the car, which is damaged beyond simple repair._

Jirobo: "Hey. Are you okay?"

Tayuya: "Yeah yeah…I thought I busted my a—butt though…" _She glances back at the car again. _"Jirobo…we should be dead. Look at the windshield. We flew right through it."

_Jirobo is about to turn and look until someone near them clears his throat. Both look up at the stranger immediately, hardly getting a good look at him in the dark._

Kabuto: "Hello…?"

Jirobo: "Oh…um. Hi. Listen, we ran into some—heh ran—into a little car trouble. My name is Jirobo, by the way. This is my sister-in-law, Tayuya. Sorry about the gate, but it looks like the car got screwed up more. Anyways, you got a phone we can use?"

Kabuto: "You both flew through a windshield."

Tayuya: "So we don't wear fucking seatbelts. We lived, didn't we?"

Jirobo: "Looks like it."_ Glares at Tayuya for a split second.  
_

Kabuto: "Suuuure…heh."

_Both catch the hint of sarcasm in Kabuto's drone, but before Jirobo or Tayuya could respond, a flash of lightning reveals several other cars parked in front of the mansion. Many, in fact._

Jirobo: "Crap. Witnesses." _He fidgets and then manages to get up, despite his girth. _"Maybe we should just find a pay phone up the road."

Kabuto: "Don't mind the fence. Like you said, no real damage done. Now the car…Well, just come inside."

Tayuya: "Sure!" _Whispers to Jirobo. _"Are you serious? I for one, am tired of staring at the road in front of me. Maybe we can chill a bit before we go on the road again. You get me?"

_Jirobo shrugs and nods, following Kabuto as he leads them both inside. As they enter, staring at the large snake statues, they are lead down a long stairway, where the sound of music begins to grow louder. Tayuya is transfixed by it, but Jirobo is starting to get a little edgy._

Jirobo: (whispers) "This is a bad idea. We should have walked."

Tayuya: (whispers) "So the music's not your thing. Relax. I'm sure these Oto people aren't all that bad."

Jirobo: "Oto?"

Tayuya: (whispers) "Don't you read, dumbass? There was a plaque on the door. "The Oto Mansion". They probably own all of nowhere." _Gestures wide with her arms, yet discreetly enough._

Act 1 Scene 3

_They arrive at a hall at the bottom of the stairs. There they find an eight-armed man, Kidomaru, disgruntledly cleaning out spider webs yet secretly saving the ones in the corners and saving the spiders whose homes he destroyed. Jirobo and Tayuya watch with interest, but Kabuto just watches with amusement._

Kabuto: "Come on. We're almost there."

Tayuya: "Is there a party going on in here?"

Kabuto: (laughs) "Oh, no. You came on a rather special night. This time our master has had a tremendous breakthrough…so he's celebrating."

Tayuya: "Nice…" (bit of sarcasm)

Kidomaru: "Yeah. You can say he's one lucky bastard." _Gets up and dusts off his many hands._ "At least he's inviting me this time."

_Both Jirobo and Tayuya are now more transfixed on the oddity, and they note that he is nearly around their age._

Kidomaru: _Stretches._ "We're all pretty lucky. Heh…" _Drones on._ "A bunch of lucky bastards."

_**Narrator**_

And because I can't deprive the play of this, I put it. XD

**Next Chapter: The Time Warp. Yes. And then some more stuff both random and weirder than the last. It's not all going to be exactly like the RHPS, but it's impossible to do, and I wanted it to be a little different. Anyways, keep on your toes! You can burn me if you want in the reviews, but if you do I might be too hurt to post the next scenes. ;;**


	2. Chapter 2

One Horror of a Picture Show - Chapter 2

**First, an apology.** I normally don't take long to post new chapters, but I just transfered to college and the computer I'm using now is a Mac, which I'm highly unused to. I found a word processor on it, but it's crap, so I have to type in all the damned tags while I'm typing up the story. As you can imagine, it is a true pain in the ass, but I love the world enough to not leave it hanging. The show must go on!

Disclaimer (Again. Heh.): I still don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show or the Time Warp(no one can by now. XD) and I don't own Naruto. Unfortunately, I no longer own Microsoft Word, so this is an unsaved Document! (Wee!) or Chapter one being recycled. (Neato!) Yes. Purnip is cheap.

Let the madness begin...

Act 1 Scene 4

_Jirobo and Tayuya finally pull their attention away from Kidomaru to find Kabuto before a dusky mirror with a fiendish grin and glasses that reflected to infinity._

Kabuto: "It's astounding...Time is fleeting...Madness...takes it's toll...But listen closely! Not for much longer...I've got to...keep control."

_Kabuto signals to Kidomaru, who frowns as Kabuto then breaks into a freaky dance that nobody really wanted to see even though they wanted to (you know.)_

Kabuto: "I remember! Doin' the time warp! Drinking those moments when blackness would hit me!"

_Kidomaru smirks. Jirobo and Tayuya, officially weirded out, give each other this half-second "what the hell?" glance before returning their attention to the weirdo dancing in the room._

Kabuto: "And the void would be calling!"

_Kabuto suddenly pulls open the two large doors labeled "Pawns", revealing a dark black, gold, and vast room, where at the end are a few select sound Shinobi dressed in frilly masqerade-like costumes. They are Orochimaru's choice henchmen, or at least, for now. Jirobo and Tayuya suddenly realise they have seen them before, when they recieved the invitations earlier that day. They throws their arms out in welcome as Kabuto shimmies on in._

Shinobi: "Let's do the time warp again!"

_Tayuya curses in suprise, Jirobo corrects her._

Shinobi: "Let's do the time warp again!"

**Narrator:** "It's just a jump to the left."

Shinobi: "And then a step to the riiiieeeiiiight!"

**Narrator:** "With your hands on your hips."

Shinobi: "You bring your knees in tiiiiight! But it's the pelvic thrust! They really drive you insaaaaane! LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

_Tayuya is actually swinging to the song, but notices Jirobo making for the door._

Shinobi: "Let's do the time warp again!"

_Tayuya goes after Jirobo, but they both run into Kidomaru, who is in an almost trance-like state, looking just as insane as Kabuto did himself._

Kidomaru: "It's so dreeeamy...Oh, fancy free me, so you can't see me...No not at all..."

_Both Tayuya and Jirobo glance at each other in alarm, simultaneously realising that Kidomaru is under a genjutsu._

Kidomaru: "In another dimension...with voyeuristic intention...Well secluded I see all. With a bit of a mind flip, you're into the time slip...nothing will ever seem the same." _He has both of them keeping their distance from him._ "You're spaced out on sensation." _Both are backing up towards the center of the room again_ "Like you're under sedation..."

Shinobi: "LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

_Jirobo and Tayuya frown, realising they got nowhere._

Shinobi: "Let's do the time warp again!"

_Sakon, one of the newer additions to Oto, appears at the end of the ballroom, singing along with near as much madness as Kidomaru...only most of it is his own. O.o_

Sakon: "Well I was walking...down the street, just having a think...when this snake of a guy...gave me an evil wink. Well it shook me up! It took me by surprise. He had a pick-up truck...And the devil's eyes. He stared at me...and I felt a change. Time meant nothing, never would again!"

Shinobi: "LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

_Jirobo and Tayuya are officially terrified._

**Narrator:** "It's just a jump to the left."

Shinobi: "And then a step to the riiiieeeiiiight!"

**Narrator:** "With your hands on your hips."

Shinobi: "You bring your knees in tiiiiight! But it's the pelvic thrust! They really drive you insaaaaane! LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN! Let's do the time warp again!"

_Suddenly, all the guests in the room collapse, either falling out of a genjutsu or exhastion or...well, who gives a fuck!? Jirobo and Tayuya want to leave but...they cant just /leave/._

Tayuya: "Well...say something!" _Pokes Jirobo._

Jirobo: (long pause) "Do any of you actually...do ninja...stuff? At all?"

_No one is amused. Tayuya puts a hand to her head in embarrassment as the Shinobi get up and glare at him. _

_**Narrator**_

And that's all for Chapter 2. XD I know, sucks huh? It's just the Time Warp Naruto-fied, but let me tell you something, on this Mac that took two hours to type.; So I /really/ love you guys. Next one should be tomorrow or next day. More will happen, it's just that for the Time Warp I /wanted/ the words to be word for word from the RHPS. Send more reviews! 


	3. Chapter 3

One Horror of a Picture Show - Chapter 3

Here, the master of this mansion is to make his appearance. But is he as odd as the servants, or as insane as his Shinobi guests?...

Well, **DUH.**

Disclaimer: Blahdy, blah. Don't own Naruto or RHPS so yeah.

Act 2 Scene 1

_Jirobo and Tayuya slowly back up as the Shinobi give them nasty looks, as though they suddenly turned all serious-like when Jirobo spoke. Behind them, the lift is descending, as a figure dressed in an Akatsuki robe taps his foot to the rhythm of a different kind. They don't notice, though the Shinobi stare reverently._

Jirobo: "See, I knew we should have left. We're surronded by wack-jobs dancing show tunes."

Tayuya: "Get a grip, Jirobo! I just wanted to check out the party."

Jirobo: "So that's what it was! I came in here for a phone. A phone damnit!"

Tayuya: "Well look who's cursing now."

Jirobo: "Whatever man! Let's just get out of here."

Tayuya: "You want to get a phone don't you?"

Jirobo: "Wait a minute...you're not seriously suggesting we /stay/, are you?"

Tayuya: "We need a phone! And I'm /still/ not going out there in the middle of nowhere! Let's just stick around, wait for the weed everyone smoked to get out of thier systems, and then ask for the phone."

Jirobo: "No amount of weed can to that" _Madly gestures to the Shinobi. _"to people."

Act 2 Scene 2

Song: Evil Mad Genius (Instead of "Sweet Transvestite")

_Tayuya suddenly catches on to the tapping of the shoe and curses when she sees the man comming down in the lift before them. Color exposes him before the Shinobi, and the lift doors fly open. The camera zooms in on his pale face and spooky yellow snake eyes._

Orochimaru: "How do you do?" _Wanders over to Jirobo and Tayuya, looking at them up and down. _"I see you've met my fellow henchman. He's a little dismayed, because when you knocked, he though you were the candyman."

_Kabuto frowns, looking a bit hurt._

Orochimaru: "Don't get strung up by the way I look..."

_Orochimaru strides down the the end of the room towards the velvet throne._

Orochimaru: "Don't judge a book by it's cover. I'm no longer the man that I once had become, but I'm still one evil mother-lover..."

_Orochimaru drops the Akatsuki cloak to the floor, revealing his pale yellow attire with the gigantic purple rope tied around him as he then sits on the throne in a very suggestive manner, causing Tayuya to blush and the Shinobi to squeal with delight._

Orochimaru: "I'm just an evil..mad genius from...Hi no Kuni, Konoha.

_He approaches Jirobo and Tayuya now, circling them with intent._

Orochimaru: "Let me show you around, the whole land of Sound, since you both look like you're pretty strong."

_Orochimaru has rounded them towards the center of the room._

Orochimaru: "Or it's a bit too intense, you can simply stay put, I'm just not into dragging others along."

_Jirobo tries to get Orochimaru's attention by walking about him, but Orochimaru moves past him to greet the Shinobi._

Jirobo: "Look, it's cool and all, but our car's worse than stalled, and we really just want to use a phone."

_Tayuya nods in agreement._

Jirobo: "We'll just stick around, until we make our call, then we'll head out on our own." Blinks realizing now that he just rhymed rather unconsciously.

_Orochimaru then turns to them with a wide grin._

Orochimaru: "You crash into a gate, Now isn't that fate? Well children, don't you panic. By the light of the night, I'll seem alright. I'll get you a satanic...mechanic."

_Orochimaru now turns from the two and walks past the Shinobi, heading for the other end of the room._

Orochimaru: "I'm just an evil..mad genius from...Hi no Kuni, Konoha.

_From the throne, Orochimaru gestures to Jirobo and Tayuya as he slowly adds the next verse._

Orochimaru: "Why don't you...stay for the night?"

Kidomaru: "Heh, night."

Orochimaru: "Or maybe a bite..."

Kidomaru: "Ha! Bite..."

Orochimaru: "I can show you my latest obsession. I've been keeping a man, with white hair and...rare clan, and he'll be useful for my future..intention..."

_From an overhead view, the Shinobi are seen about Orochimaru, adoringly close to him._

Orochimaru: "I'm just an evil..mad genius from...Hi no Kuni, Konoha.

_Orochimaru makes for the lift. Shinobi follow, repeating the last parts of the last verse. When Orochimaru makes it to the top, he glances at Jirobo and Tayuya below._

Orochimaru: "So come up to the Lab, and see what's on the slab. I see you shiver with anticipation. But maybe the rain is really to blame, so I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom."

**_Narrator:_** End of Chapter Threeeeee! Four will be oh so soon. I hoped you liked it, since I ended up making up something else in place of Sweet Transvestite with a lot of the original lyrics that made more sense for this intact. I know, bad me. Everyone wanted to picture Orochimaru in transvestite attire, but no. XD Next chapter you shall see Kimimaro! Yay! Oh, and a little teaser, but there will be a few 'special unexpected guests' playing as Dr. Scotty and a different included role I had to add to make sense, but it won't effect the flow of the RHPS in this play. In fact, it was /why/ they were added. So stay tuned!"


	4. Chapter 4

One Horror of a Picture Show - Chapter 4

Orochimaru seems to have accepted Jirobo and Tayuya as special guests, and now he plans to show them his latest craze. What is it that Orochimaru plans to show them /really/? What kind of madness awaits the two future siblings on this insane and worrysome night? Only the play can tell...

Disclaimer: I'm working on it, but it doesn't look like I can own Naruto or RHPS. I guess I'll get over it, but until then, on with the show.

Act 3 Scene 1

_The Shinobi applaud with much zeal. Kabuto and Kidomaru close in on Jirobo and Tayuya. Kabuto begins to remove Jirobo's damaged and torn clothing while Kidomaru tries, while dodging Tayuya's punches, to remove hers. Jirobo and Tayuya were too suprized that they would even think it to really fight them off. Both stand there scowling, as the Shinobi gaze upon them, showing their impression. This goes on for what feels like forever._

Tayuya: "Fuck. Now look at us."

Jirobo: "Stop cursing Tayuya. It's not as bad as it looks, I hope. Let's just...go along. This Orochimaru guy sounds mad. Mad and dangerous. We shouldn't try to run off now."

Tayuya: "What, you don't want to run outside anymore now that you're in your underpants? Damn, someone put some clothes on this guy..."

_Jirobo then turns to Sakon, who appears to be observing him very intently._

Jirobo: "Er, hi. Yeah, up here. Hi. My name is Jirobo, and this is...Tayuya. And you are...?"

Sakon: "You are very lucky to be invited as guests up to Orochimaru's laboratory. Some people get chopped up and hauled up there for parts and sacrifices."

_Kabuto opens the cage doors of the lift, and several of the Shinobi begin to crowd in._

Jirobo: "People get sacrificed?"

Sakon: "I've been there. Seen it."

_Sakon then escorts the two to the lift. Kabuto tosses out two of the Shinobi to make room for them and then slams the door behind them. As the lift begins to rise, Jirobo and Tayuya are pushed against the crate, now irritably staring straight ahead._

Tayuya: (to Kidomaru) "Is it, I mean he, Orochimaru, your father?"

Kidomaru: "What? Hell no. I don't think he ever had or ever will have kids. I mean really." _Kidomaru smirks._ "We're simply his servants."

Tayuya: "But why?"

_The lift comes to an abrupt halt, and when the cage slides open, the question is immediately dismissed as everyone makes for the lab entrance. The lab is actually rather organized, though still dark and dusky, with those ever-present jars of body parts lined up neatly on the walls and a coffin here or there. There is a massive freezer on the wall to one side, closed and forgotte-looking. In the center of the room there is a massive tank, but it isn't as much shallow as it is long. Above it hangs a candle-holding chandellier that provides little light, but the lab is illuminated enough so that everyone and everything is quite visible. Several important books are laid out with information valuable to reviving the near-dead. Many of the sections are marked on the exposed pages._

_There are several gifts about the tank, like a sword, several weapons, and special summoning scrolls. They are intended for Kimimaro. The Shinobi await near the entrance of the lab, a little too frightened to get too close. Orochimaru, now dressed in a more fitting konoha-nin vest and all, prepares to speak to his guests._

Orochimaru: "Sakon, Kidomaru, go and assist Kabuto."

_The two move past the other Shinobi and join Kabuto at a table by the tank, where one book in particular is opened to a proper page, and several ingredients to make the jutsu in store possible are laid out._

Orochimaru: "I will entertain...ah..."

_Jirobo and Tayuya step out of the lift._

Jirobo: "I'm Jirobo, and this is my sister-to-be Tayuya."

Orochimaru: _He takes Tayuya's hand to kiss._ "Hmm...How nice. And what charming underclothes you both have." _He smirks and takes two dust coats from Kabuto, handing them to Jirobo._ "But here, put these on. They'll make you feel less vulnerable."

_Orochimaru makes his way to the tank by Kabuto and Kidomaru, who are busy flipping through the book and arranging things._

Orochimaru: (to Shinobi) "It's not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them hospitality."

Jirobo: "Hospitality! All we wanted to do was use your phone. You'd think it was a crime to ask."

Tayuya: "Jirobo...remember 'people get chopped up and hauled.' Don't talk to this guy like that..."

Jirobo: "But seriously! You get what I mean, right? I'm not the only one, right?"

Tayuya: "Shut up, retard!"

_The room then goes quiet, as all the Shinobi look to Orochimaru, waiting for a reaction. Orochimaru then breaks into a smile._

Orochimaru: "How brave you are, Jirobo. A perfect specimen of shinobi-hood. So strong."

_Kidomaru and Sakon laugh._

Orochimaru: "You must be a little jealous of him, Tayuya."

Tayuya: "Bah. I don't need size or strength. I have this." _She shows her flute off for a second before putting it away again. Orochimaru shows a hint of impression before returning his attention to Jirobo._

Orochimaru: "Do you have any blood limit?"

Jirobo: "Well...no."

Orochimaru: "Oh well. How about you, Tayuya?" _He laughs_

_Kabuto is behind Orochimaru, looming there._

Kabuto: "Everything is ready, Orochimaru-sama. On your cue"

Orochimaru: "Yes." _He goes back towards the tank, standing before everyone._ "Am I speaking clearly enough? Can you hear me there in back? Good. Tonight, my unconventional conventionists...tonight you are about to witness a breakthrough in the science of forbidden jutsus."

_Everyone but Kabuto, Jirobo, and Tayuya gasps._

Orochimaru: "A new body will be mine."

_Everyone claps. Tayuya is about to clap, unsure, but Jirobo indicates that she shouldn't._

Orochimaru: "It was strange the way it happened, one of those quirks of fate really. One of those moments when you seem irredeemably lost: you panic; you're trapped; your back's against the wall. There's no way out, and then suddenly, you get a break. All the pieces seem to fit into place. How lost you've been. What a fool. The answer was there all the time. It took a small accident to make it happen. An accident!"

_Kidomaru and Sakon step behind Orochimaru._

Both: "An accident?" _They both look at each other with a smirk, as if they didn't believe him._

Orochimaru: "That's how I discovered the secret. That elusive ingredient, that roadway to a never-ending life. But tonight, I bring back to life a subject, whom I have taken a fancy to, and will be that ingredient I have so longed for."

_Shinobi applaud._

Orochimaru: "You see, Jirobo and Tayuya, you are fortunate, for tonight is the night that my favorite subject is revived to full health; the subject whose body I plan to take as my own."

_Everybody applauds except for Jirobo and Tayuya, who are too shocked to really believe such things. Orochimaru then uncovers the tank as Kabuto then takes his side, ready to assist his master with the proceedings. Inside the tank, suspended in clear fluid, is a bandaged body, preserved._

Orochimaru: "Prepare the sacrifices!"

_Kabuto brings out two people bound in tight ropes, both too weak to fight back._

Orochimaru: "The ritual begins!"

_Orochimaru stands back, now performing the forbidden jutsu that would help revive the subject. Kabuto assists by taking the two sacrifices, and the deed is soon complete, which leaves the Shinobi astonished, Kidomaru and Sakon awed, and Jirobo and Tayuya horrified. The liquid in the tank drains away and the bandaged figure begins to rise._

Tayuya: "Jirobo..."

Jirobo: "It's alright, Tayuya." _He gulps._

_Orochimaru climbs up one side of the tank while Kabuto climbs the other. Kimimaro gets up in the tank, arms stretched forward. Both Orochimaru and Kabuto take the bandages off of his head. Kimimaro looks at both of them, but then leaps up and grabs a hold of the chandellier. Orochimaru frowns as he tries to retrieve him, but Kimimaru swings forward and lands before the tank, facing the Shinobi._

Act 3 Scene 2

Song: Sword of Damocles

Kimimaro: "The Sword of Damocles is hanging over my head."

_Orochimaru jumps down from the ladder, but the purple rope tying his robe gets caught on it, causing him to fall. Kabuto is too busy trying to keep from laughing._

Kimimaro: "And I've got the feeling someone's going to be cutting the thread. Oh, woe is me. My life is a misery. Oh, can't you see that I'm at the start...of a pretty big downer..."

_As Orochimaru gets level with him, he lunges for Kimimaro, but he lands inside the tank because Kimimaro simultaneously abandons the tank area all together, jumping between Kidomaru and Sakon who now each have a pair of kunai with which they will cut out his arm and leg bandages._

Kimimaro: "I woke up this morning with a start when I fell out of bed."

Shinobi: "That ain't no crime." (including Kabuto, Kidomaru, and Sakon)

Kimimaro: "And left from my dreaming was a feeling of un-nameable dread."

Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "My high is low. I'm dressed up with no place to go. And all I know is I'm at the start..of a pretty big downer.

_Orochimaru, who has caught up with Kimimaro now, tries to put his arm around his neck, but Kimimaro easily slides free. Kidomaru and Sakon hang on to the end of Kimimaro's chest bandages as he comes free._

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."

_Kimimaro is now unbandaged as he strikes a very elegant pose. During the last sequence, Orochimaru climbs out of the tank onto Kabuto's shoulders and purses Kimimaro, but they fall._

**Narrator:** (Me, reading from script) "Rock-I mean Kimimaro-needed peace of mind. He didn't know he was doing just fine. He was the product of another time. And as for feeling down - Well that's not a crime."

_Orochimaru and Kabuto are recovering from the fall while Kimimaru begins to go around the Shinobi._

Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: (To first group of Shinobi.) "The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head."

Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: (To second group.) "And I've got the feeling someone's going to be cutting the thread."

Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."

Kimimaru: (To third group.) "Oh, woe is me. My life is a misery. (to fourth group) Oh, can't you see that I'm at the start...of a pretty big downer..."

_Kimimaro then breaks into a run as Orochimaru has recovered and sets after him. He continues to chase Kimimaro._

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."

Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."

Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."

_At the end of number, Kimimaro has climbed up the ladder attached to the end of the tank and Orochimaru is in a heap below. Kabuto is behind the tank and Kidomaru and Sakon in their positions in front of it._

_**Narrator:** And that's all for chapter four! I thought it was okay for Kimimaro to sing Sword of Dimacles. Was it? Aww who cares? It all still rocks. But what shall happen in chapter five? Tune in, my good friends. All in good time. From my perspective, Orochimaru does look a little pissed off, having to chase Kimimaro around, but if he needs him so badly...he just might forgive him. XD_


End file.
